Feeling heavy feels for the team that reconstructed this shattered jaw 12 years ago. It’s always been really interesting to me that I receive compliments on my smile so frequently, & yet I feel like I’ve had such a turbulent relationship to this part of my being. I remember going to the dentist with my grandmother when I was a young girl & BEGGING the doctor to push all of my teeth together so I wouldn’t have any gaps; Pleading with my brothers & cousin, in the basement of the Bates house, to pleaseee just give me braces! After they sent me on a scavenger hunt to acquire all items necessary: paper clips, aluminum foil, rubber bands, & Kool Aid - I realized that the Kool Aid would be the only item on that list that would be utilized that day. I’ve also got myself into a lot of situations with this mouth. Good & bad. Anyways - lots of gratitude. For dentists - for never actually needing braces - for now knowing how important it is to care for your teeth. For learning how to tap into the power of communication for good. For this ultra light beam smile! Kanye West - “through the wire” - now playing. 👌🏽
Happy Mother’s Day!
I wish I could gift you with a hand-picked bouquet of flowers. There are so many wonderful wild ones that surround me here in the tiny home.
Today at work - I observed a grown man & his mom at brunch.
Him leaning over occasionally to plant kisses on her cheek. Her giggling & playfully brushing him off. The entire scene was so precious it made me ache. I thought about you & your soft, velvety cheeks -
Thank you for my healthy glow. 💁🏻♀️ It’s nice -
what space will allow room for in relationships.
How real distance & yearning can transform.
I think about you a lot lately. Especially as I become more aware of myself, my beloved female friends, & the nature of what it means to be a woman in this world. The sacrifice that motherhood is -
the gift & the infinite opportunity for growth.
i see you.
i love you.
We moved through a whole hell of a lot as a unit, & I’m grateful forever for the sacrifices you made for us. I find myself excited to grow older & by experience, understand you more.
i miss you & i wish I could squeeze you in person!
I’ll have to settle with these pics & a little spritz of your perfume — the travel bottle of Clinique - Happy, that the wonderful woman I met at the farm gifted me with after I shared with her how intoxicating her presence was because she smelled like you. 🙏🏽💆🏻♀️
PROUD FRIEND MOMENT*
Today these two hard-working seekers/farmers shared their labor of love & recently energized brand with all of us “plant people” on this island. I love you so much it hurts @thebabahaha - Jakey, you’re pretty amazing as well, brother! Congrats! 💓👨🌾👩🏻🌾
Happiest of Birthdays to this grounded male force in my life! The only man in MY WolfPack - Seany, you healed me. Thank you for teaching me about true, unconditional love. Thank you for always demonstrating how to be of service to those you care for. Thank you for consistently showing up for me & giving me one of the healthiest friendships I’ve ever had with a man. Thank you for your patience & for your ability to make me feel at HOME in your presence. Thank you for always lending an ear & for LISTENING WITHOUT JUDGEMENT. Especially when I’m in the wrong. Thank you for our FaceTime only phone conversions. Thank you for your sincere generosity. Thank you for your songs, your dance, your laughter, your contagiousness - YOUR PLAY. Thank you for honoring the sacred feminine & for holding so much space for us. Thank you for your pace. For teaching me how to slow down. I love you. So. So. Much. “You’re gonna rock this decade!” Love, mob wife! 💕🐺👁👨🌾🕺🏼☀️
Thank you to all of my bb’s for making this an incredible weekend stuffed with a deep & simple reverence for life! This farm had a hand in my healing this past year & I wouldn’t have wanted to dance the weekend away anywhere else!
Thank you beautiful people, for all the birthday love!
I’ve had many people ask, “what did you do??” - & to be honest, the highlight of my actual birthDAY, was wandering under this mythic tree to nap after an acupuncture session that I swear I floated out of. My Dad called me shortly after I woke up from said nap, & asked what I was doing. He seemed mildly irritated when I shared with him that I was snoozing under a tree in some random park. And it struck me — How incredibly privileged I am to be comfortable falling asleep here; that I RARELY have the thought, “am I safe in this moment?” I have never locked the door of my tiny home since I’ve lived here, I leave my keys in the car at home, & the people in my life right now, genuinely have my best interest in mind. It was like I was flooded with a clear understanding of how held & protected I am & all the work I’ve done: ALL THE CHOICES I’VE MADE - to make this my reality today. It wasn’t always this way for me, & in recent years, I was not willing or able to adopt the pace of nature; to stop to take a nap. Absolutely not. I believed that naps were for slothy people. This year: that construct is the one I am working on. The gift I’ve given myself, is to actively do LESS. No need to be on any boards this year, no need to volunteer OR WORK all of my time away. I’ve scaled back — put a stake in the ground for my spiritual & emotional well-being. 28: The year of slow & steady. So fuck yea - Happy Birthday to me. To us! ✊🏽🧘🏻♀️👌🏽💓🤞🏽
I asked, “how do you feel?!” she replied ......... Surfjack penthouse takeover was a success! So impressed with @contacthawaii : Reimagining Waikiki - I watched @djgodiva hoard all of these single use plastic bottles from guests at the hotel for a min & this is always why I appreciate good artists — because they can tell these stories. Hopefully someone is now less inclined to to buy single use plastic products, & maybe these installations flash in their minds when when reach for the water bottle or something - but at the very least, I hope people saw that you can say what you want to say in many, many ways! Let’s keep talking!!
About 2 years ago, back home in Michigan, when I was working way late into the night building benches, shelving, & yoga mat hangers for Remedy, the yoga studio that made me a first time business owner — I had this crystal clear vision of myself: a silver braid crawling down my back, working in a wood shop with a view, respirator on, sorting through my mind while I poured myself into taming a few stunning pieces of wood assembled together in a way I saw fit. Although I only have a few silver hairs, Allen guided me through this build, and at this point in my life, I’m most frequently rocking a tidda bun - I’d say I’m right on track. 👌🏽
All reused & repurposed — the legs & sides are from an old mahogany church pue & the top is the old Punahou gym floor !
I found a few grey hairs today. I actually squealed out loud to myself & closely followed it up with a teenaged “fuck yea!” — acknowledging what I choose to believe - is the tangible result of my moving, sometimes trudging through this bizarre journey. I think grey is beautiful on a woman, especially when it’s “premature.”
I think aging is a delightful gift that we are constantly unpacking. Of course, there are times my body demonstrates to me that it’s transitioning, & that the immense strain that I have put on it for the majority of its existence is lingering about somewhere close-by, waiting for a goodnight kiss — gently reminding me that in a few years, I will not have the same physical range that I have right now. Part of my excitement for all of this is certainly fueled by my fantasies of a time when the little girl inside of me isn’t the one driving: for when I get to that stage of the relationship with my intuition, where one is taking a shit while the other is in the shower. You know?? I look forward to an irrefutable sense of self. 2 weeks away from 28 - feeeeeeeling Saturn’s Return. 👌🏽🤔😫🤪☺️🤫😶🤞🏽