*INTRODUCING LAURA... I am so excited to introduce one of our speakers for Melters Meetup in October. The fabulous Laura from @dibney_cottage_adventures will be running a workshop on “How do we first aid our mental health and wellbeing?” Here’s a little bit about Laura:
My name is Laura, I am a nurse, a wife, a shoe fanatic, a lover of colour, baking, and a passionate advocate of mental health. I have been on a journey of discovery over the last three years, learning the joys of meditation and putting together my mental health first aid kit. I feel it gives me the power to be in control and gives me the confidence I need so that I can take a minute to deal with how I feel and to be more in control of day to day issues that arise in "normal life". I am a firm believer that you should never take for granted three things, your health, your family and the restorative powers of chocolate. I am excited to share with you all the tips I use each day from my "first aid kit" - Love Laura xx
This is going to be a challenging and practical session where you come away with a toolkit to trial.
If you haven’t booked your ticket yet go quick as we only have a few left! Link in bio!
Had a wee bit of a hiatus over here because I got sick twice in three weeks and I eventually listened to my body and rested properly. Proper self care.
I’m back now and I’m so excited to bring you more details of our first ever melters meetup over the next few days including some great characters who are running our sessions, where our fabulous dinner is coming from, and what goodies are going to be in the gift bags!! Remember if you haven’t got your ticket yet, link is in my bio.
Can’t wait to see you all there!
*MELTERS MEETUP... It’s finally here. The time to announce some details about my new project - Melters Meetup!
Melters Meetup is an evening of good food, community, self-care and support. It is a relaxed and informal way to take some time out for yourself with like-minded people, and hear about different techniques for looking after yourself.
Healthy, filling and wholesome supper
Self-care workshops from local practitioners and experts including Q&A time
Informal chat over tea and coffee
and more surprise treats... 10 tickets are up for grabs at the early-bird price of £30.00! Link in bio for more details or email me at firstname.lastname@example.org to book yours today!
*ENDING... And so with that, the first ever Self-Care series is over.
How did you find it?
Did anything not work for you?
Did you discover other things that suited you on your journey?
It has been a pleasure to host.
Keep your eyes peeled for more upcoming series and a BIG announcement in the coming days!
Are you excited? I am!! 🙋🏻♀️ All series posts are also pulled together on the blog HappyIs.co if you fancy looking at the actions again.
*LOVE... Show yourself some love. Seriously.
We are our biggest critics. “Why did I say that?” “I’m not good enough.” “I need to do this and then I will feel better.” “I am ashamed of my house.” “I hate my body.” “I don’t do enough every day.” “I’m lazy.” Could you imagine someone else saying these things to us? Or us saying these things to someone else? It just wouldn’t happen (and if it did good luck to them...) We do not show ourselves kindness and love. We set ourselves impossible expectations. We are nasty. We force ourselves to feel guilt. We set ourselves up to fail.
You deserve love. You deserve to say good things to yourself. And it’s for no other reason than you exist. You don’t need to reserve your positive encouragement for when you do absolutely everything and are some sort of wonder human!
Whether you are lying in week-old pyjamas on the sofa, whether there is no housework done, whether you are having your third bun of the day, whether you just aren’t feeling being in work today, whether you have used dry shampoo for the third day in a row, whether you ate a slightly questionable leftover slice of oven pizza. Do all of this without shame!
There is nothing else to be said except WELL DONE! You have survived. You are surviving. You are amazing. You are doing your best, whatever that is, today.
Please just be kind to yourself. Show yourself some love. It’s important.
*TAKE CONTROL... Life. It comes up on us suddenly. It flies by. It spirals out of our control.
Sometimes we can get so caught up in the things that plague our minds that when we look out, we feel completely out of control. Life feels like it is speeding past and we can’t jump on board.
But nothing is ever really out of your control when it comes to self-care and looking after yourself.
Sometimes we just need a little reminder and a little push to do whatever it is we need to do to take control.
We can easily get caught up in society’s expectations and feel like we have no choices. We have choices. You have choices. Take back control of your own life and your own destiny.
I quit my job. I’m not loaded. I don’t have a family who I can turn to for financial support. Am I worried about money? Yeah. Am I worried that my business idea might not work? Yeah. Am I happier and more in control than I was in the job? Yeah!
I was miserable. I was being forced to not live my values. I was spiralling. I felt I wasn’t able to live my purpose. It was sinking me into depression. So I jumped.
Now of course this is a rather drastic example and there are many other smaller things that affect our mental health and well-being that we can take control of. Our space, physically and online, control it. Our experiences. Our relationships. Our calendars. Control it.
Do what is best for you. Say no. Declutter. Do things. Say goodbye to friends. Make new ones. Take control of your life. Take control of your self-care. Take it back and live how you should.
This is your time. Enjoy it. Embrace the good and the bad that will inevitably happen, but don’t just accept injustices, inequality or “that’s just the way it is”. Live on YOUR terms.
It’s freedom like no other. And I will never give it up again.
I would love to hear your thoughts on this. Do you feel like you live your way or do you feel like you aren’t in control? Comment below or tag @happyis.co in posts and stories and use the hashtag #selfcareseries
Take it back.
*RELEASE ENERGY... Throughout the day our energies change. That’s normal. Our lives are jam-packed these days with things! All the things. Good, bad, indifferent. And during the day we keep in and bottle up emotions. Anger, frustration, sadness, laughter, excitement. We are scared of judgement, scared of being seen as a ‘loose cannon’ or unprofessional (whatever that actually means?!) , the loud one, the one with the weird laugh, the emotional one...etc.
Well here’s the deal. Emotions are real. They are normal. They are biological. They need expressed. They need released. Keeping them in all day means they build up. You will feel like you can’t concentrate,. You will overthink. You will judge yourself. You will think others are judging you. You might feel physical symptoms like tense shoulders. All of this energy needs released. The negative energy and the positive energy.
If you feel you can’t release it during the day for whatever reason, then you need to release it in a space where you feel safe.
Go for a run.
Scream into a pillow.
Get dolled up and go dance.
Rave in your pyjamas.
Howl at the moon.
Jump on the bed!
Whatever you need to do to release that energy you do it. Cleanse it out. Feel free. Feel relaxed. Feel 100% yourself. You deserve it and you are great just as you are.
I would love to hear your thoughts on this. Do you feel you can be yourself during the day or does it cause you tension when you can’t release your emotions? Comment below or tag @happyis.co in posts and stories and use the hashtag #selfcareseries
Cut the judgement.
*STOP... Rest. Relaxation. Peace. Recovery.
We all need to stop sometimes, but we just aren’t all that good at it. We end up running ourselves into the ground, getting sick, burning out, exhausting ourselves.
We are not meant to be on the go all day everyday. Mentally and physically we need to learn and accept that our minds and bodies need rest, need peace, need relaxation because they need to recover.
Stopping or resting or even taking life at a slower pace that the rest of the world is so quickly judged as laziness. It’s a badge of merit to be busy. To be working extra hours. To stay late at work. (Even though we usually don’t get paid for this! Are we really okay with devaluing ourselves that much?) We even say negative things about this to ourselves. But the thing is, we are just not meant to be living in a rat race, and our minds and bodies know it. There is no shame in taking yourself out of it. You deserve and need rest.
Stopping is necessary all across the world and throughout nature. And it’s just accepted as normal. Siestas, hibernation, napping. These things happen because rest is essential.
Rest is elusive in our society but it doesn’t have to be elusive in our lives.
Take the time to stop. To rest. To nap. To slow down the pace of your day, or your life.
Stop...and allow your mind and body to recover. To feel peace.
I would love to hear your thoughts on rest. Do you feel pressure to always be busy?
Comment below or tag @happyis.co in posts and stories and use the hashtag #selfcareseries
Rest. Stop. Take care of yourself.
*COMMUNE... Loneliness and isolation is rampant in our society today. Long gone are the days where we all lived deeply connected to our communities and our neighbours. Doors in streets used to be left open. A welcome invitation for a cuppa tea and a chat.
Now we are on the go. We are constantly online. We have access to social media all day. Some might ask how we can be lonely when we can talk to so many people all day, but there is no substitute for human connection. For face to face laughter, tears, hugs, talks over a cuppa (and a donut). We don’t need to leave our doors open, but we do need to start to make sure that we talk to people about our lives and our thoughts in person. A friend, our partner, our kids, our families, the checkout assistant, the bus driver, the postman, the old lady in the street. Go out and talk. Commune!
Join a group. Visit your community centre. Go for coffee. Walk in nature.
Behind Instagram and social media are humans. We need to commune and to connect or we can lose ourselves. We can experience anxiety. We feel alone.
Today I encourage you to commune, or to connect, or even arrange to do it. Being around people who lift you up and who you feel safe around is so good for our minds and our hearts. Do not be afraid. You are amazing. Get out there and talk to other humans. Even if it is only an hour. You will be uplifted and encouraged and strengthened by it.
I would love to hear your thoughts or if you feel that being around people makes you feel better in yourself. Sometimes we do need alone time, but we can’t underestimate the power of connection.
Comment below or tag @happyis.co in posts and stories and use the hashtag #selfcareseries
Look after you. Take care of others. We are all in this community together.
*HEADSPACE... Social media. Where we are right now, and where we spend a lot of our time. Sometimes mindlessly, sometimes not. There is no doubt just how much headspace and time we give to being online, being constantly connected and being “up-to-date”. Social media can be amazing. It has the power to connect and to help us forge relationships that probably wouldn’t have come about without it. It gives us a space to voice, to create, to discuss and to debate.
But there is no denying it comes with problems. (Cambridge analytics anyone?!) I won’t go on a rant about social control mechanisms. What I want to say is that in life we won’t like everyone. We aren’t supposed to, and that’s okay. In person, we would just ignore someone who doesn’t uplift us. We wouldn’t allow that person into our physical space. But on social media, we see people, news, comments, who/that are in our headspace and aren’t positive for us.
Today is a reminder that your social media platforms, your phone, your online presence - all of that is your space. Yours. Yours to control. Yours to enjoy.
A few months ago I deleted all news apps from my phone. I am a news obsessive but it causes me so much anxiety. So I removed it from my headspace. I took control.
I have turned off notifications for Twitter, messenger and other apps and now I only check them periodically. I have forced myself to have headspace.
We have choices when it comes to social media and online content. You can control what you see, what you respond to, how long you spend on it, what headspace you give to it.
Is social media causing you to feel anxious or have you experienced the negative side of it? I would love to hear your experiences. Comment below or tag @happyis.co in your posts and stories and use the hashtag #selfcareseries
Take the step today and get some headspace. Take 15 minutes and set the phone down. Clear out the negative. Drink a cuppa and just be in the moment.
*MEDITATE... Stillness. Quiet. Peacefulness.
How many of us think that our days are filled with these? I would guess almost none of us.
Stillness is at bedtime (if we are lucky). Our worlds are never quiet these days with trains, planes, automobiles, internet access, television, and the constant need to be going somewhere, doing something and feeling connected online.
Peacefulness is a distant desire.
Inner peace. A calm. Wouldn’t it be lovely to have that, even for a while each day?
It is possible.
A focus on our breath. A focus on a moment where we can be still and alone.
This can be when the babies are napping, a break when you are out on a run, at the toilet, in the shower, right before bed.
When you begin, consciously notice your breath. You don’t need to change it. Just allow that brain that is going constantly with all the thoughts of the day, to focus on your breath; give that brain something else to do.
There will still be thoughts coming and going in the back of your mind, but by focusing on your breath you are creating a moment of peace and allowing your brain and body to reset.
It only needs to be for a few minutes. Of course it would be amazing to take 15 or 30 minutes and do a session of meditation, but in reality we don’t always have this time.
So today, let’s keep it simple. Find a space in your day for a few minutes of focusing on your breath. I think you will feel a difference in how you are feeling afterwards.
Perhaps you meditate in a different way? Perhaps you have other ways to find peace in your day? I would love to hear about your experiences.
Comment below or tag @happyis.co in posts and stories and use the hashtag #selfcareseries
Take a moment for you today to connect back to yourself.
*CREATE... William Blake wrote: “I must create a system, or be enslaved by another man’s. I will not reason and compare: my business is to create.” Creativity is an expression of ourselves: the core of our uniqueness and existence. Without it we would be robots. When we don’t have an outlet we can start to feel like we are losing ourselves and that can bring us down and cause anxiety and stress.
Creating and creativity does not have to be a masterpiece or a composition of wonder. It is personal to you. If your goal for your creativity is self-sufficiency or business, then awesome! BUT it doesn’t have to be. It is about you. Taking time for something you enjoy and are passionate about. It’s about celebrating your individuality and your existence.
Creating can be absolutely anything: -writing
And so much more!! Today I am going to spend some time knitting because I started this scarf many moons ago when I was teaching myself how to knit and I haven’t ever finished it.
What will you do to express your creativity today? What do you love to create? Share your thoughts below, tag @happyis.co in stories and use the hashtag #selfcareseries
Take time to connect with yourself and your creativity. Do something that is just about you today.
*DECLUTTER... Stuff. Things. Junk. Treasures. “I’ll get around to it...Maybe I will wear it...I might use it one day...what if I need it...” I am a self-confessed clutter-bug. I say all of the above regularly and have a constant pile (or more truthfully several piles) of stuff all around. Stuff I need to do something with. Stuff I don’t. Stuff that is beyond repair. Stuff that isn’t. Stuff that needs donated. Stuff that would make others happy.
Clutter can really create anxiety and stress. It plays in on our minds even subconsciously. Even digital clutter!
I challenge you today to de clutter one aspect of your life and space today. I am decluttering all of my handbags, makeup and jewellery. I’m even getting rid of the old bags themselves that I just don’t use!
You could do your purse, a pile, a cupboard, a drawer, your computer, your phone...the list is endless because we keep so much stuff. So much clutter.
That clutter can block our energies and stop us from having the time and mental focus to be able to take care of ourselves. It can be a distraction from focusing on ourselves. It can cause us to panic and feel that we need to tidy up.
Kick it to the kerb. You will feel so much lighter. Do as much or as little as you feel, but don’t overdo it. This is about what YOU need.
What will you declutter today? Do you agree or want to share your experiences? Maybe this post doesn’t resonate with you (and that’s okay). I would love to hear your thoughts and chat on this. Comment below, or post what you are doing today and tag me @happyis.co and use the hashtag #selfcareseries
Take the time today to do this for you. You deserve it and are worthy of peace.
*LAUNCHING... This week The Self Care Series is kicking off. Will you take the time to look inward and take action to look after yourself? Or perhaps even begin to think about it?
Every day there will be a new post with an action that is connected to Self Care. Some of these actions won’t feel like they fit you, and that’s okay. These are actions that have worked for me. You are your own person so this is just some ideas to get you started on your journey to look after yourself on a daily basis.
I would love you to join in. Tag me in stories and posts using @happyis.co and use the hashtag #selfcareseries
I can’t wait to learn from you all and share what each of us are doing to take care of ourselves.
If you would rather not share, but want to chat in private, feel free to DM me for a chat.
We are all in this together.
Well done for taking this first step. You are amazing.