I have spent a lot of time leaving things up to chance and the stars. It helped me feel like I could blame everything but myself if things went “wrong.” The weight of making choices was too much.
To simplify, all my choices are made from a place of love.
Simply choosing love to be love opens the opportunity to receive love. This takes me back to my original desire, to receive the next steps in my life rather than struggle to make the right one. Though a choice is made, the right one is clear.
Choose love to receive love, and the hippy dippy star talk will start to make sense ✨
I got stopped in the Omaha airport by a person asking me about my tattoos. One of the questions he asked was about my “struggle.” He said, “well places like this, I’m sure you struggle to not be looked at, seen as a weirdo or a specimen, right?”
My reply was,
“My struggle is not because I have chosen to tattoo my body. My struggle comes from being born a women and a gay person. Life is filled with personal challenges, those are not inherent struggles.”
This made me think of all the interaction I have seen, been a part of, or heard of in the past. So many people do not really understand their privilege because we are all human and have personal struggles and hardships. These are all valid and real challenges but they are not a systematic implication of being born a person of color, female, disabled, etc.
I am all for yogic oneness, yes I see you, heart to heart, the same, unified in divinity but we have a responsibility today.
It is important that we know where we came from, our ancestors. We need to connect with our impact on history, how that has left us now present day, and how to act with that knowledge so we can better work for equality and justice In the future because we are not there yet.
I have seen body workers and chiropractors since I was 13.
I have had pain to the point of tears way before I broke any bones.
My whole family is filled with cracky pops and slippery parts.
Some things do live in your family line but that doesn’t mean they are you.
I refine my practice on a regular basis because things are always shifting and my parts always feel different. Years of falling on my head, crotching the beam, and a collection of sprains and broken bones leaves me here. In a place where I am so interested in my body that I dedicated my life to the investigation of this mess.
I don’t practice cus it’s easy. I don’t get out of bed and whip out a wheel. I’m just a student studying my shape and the science of movement, and hopefully my studies make me helpful to you.
We put so much pressure on ourselves in every other aspect of life, your practice doesn’t have to be one of them.
Whatever your feel good centering is, running, yoga, coffee, or a walk, the moment stress and attachment or expectation is put towards accomplishing it, the practice has just become another mundane stressor of life.
It’s ok to have stresses, in the western world it’s normal, but what brings you and the body peace shouldn’t be one of them.
Release the pressure, reclaim the release.
If you are the teachers that preaches the importance of being open to something new, seeing that every body is different, and offers modifications for someone “unique form,” this examination of individuality should be spread throughout your vision of humans.
The lessons in yoga are not just for on the mat. Some people have a modified way of getting through life, they don’t fit in your box, and can’t help but live their life open to something new because they are the ones in their communities paving the way.
The same vision of someone’s body being fluid for health must push over into our vision on culture and existence. The fluidity of your mind, reduces judgment and rigidity from the body.
Connect the dots to de-box. Let us modify, invent, and be different in our lives.
Just like in teaching- when someone does something different looking on the mat, it’s not a personal attack on you. I promise.
Rest has been my greatest teacher over the past 6 months.
I have gotten sick and/or lost my voice 5 or 6 times over this past year (I usually never get sick). Between divorcing my wife, moving, losing my mom and dad, traveling to 8 different countries, and thinking my practice on the mat was going to fix it all, I ran myself down and pretended i was ok.
While I am still recover from all of these things, I rely on rest and my emotions around it. Practicing everyday doesn’t make you a yogi. Pushing through mental and physical discomfort doesn’t make you advanced. Pretending and just sticking it out won’t bring you to a sense of stillness.
Rest is the best asana. It won’t fix it all, but your emotional and physical response to it can open new doors you have been waiting to move through.
Since being single for the first time in ten years and traveling the world alone I have started a dedicated journal entry for all the things that give me life. This just puts out in front of me all the beauty I am enlivened by and passes lonely feelings during 13 hour bus rides.
This week I was reminded of the stability you feel from being near family, chosen or karmic.
I’m lucky to have family around the world but nothing puts more joy in my heart than the comfort of a good time with an old friend. And then the other thing was this great shirt I found in my storage.
It can be anything!
What is giving you life today or this week and why? What does recognizing this do for you and what might you need to shift if you have a hard time thinking of such a thing?
When you’re happy and you know it, go full cheese!
I’m a lucky little clam to have you all🖤 Thank you for your love and support!
Teaching Hot yoga Sunday morning @thefoundryaz Tempe 9am!
No one ever needs to explain why they need a safe space. A victim should not have to justify their experience. A human does not have to explain their emotional state. A child does not have to stop, change, or be scolded for being where they are.
Meeting each other halfway is a start to better understanding and existing together. Acknowledge someone’s emotions rather than try to change them for your own personal comfort.
Back yourself up out of your all consuming life and see the situation, see the person, and be with them in their current space.
We can be together and different. We can connect and share. You may never really know someone’s situation but you can work to understand.
We are good alone but better together. 📷: @lifeinanimage
The word authenticity has been flooding my mind space, writing, and my feed.
So naturally, I’ll take the next few minutes to rant.
It doesn’t work for me. Your inspirational, fancy scripted quotes with all the insight packed purposefully into a delightful post. I don’t hear you.
We are in a time of impersonal connection and disconnected communication.
We wake up and go to bed scrolling, missing the intimacy with the people right next to us in real life.
We share in the fake world of space but close off face to face.
Where did you get your insight? What fueled your inspiration?
I’m looking through who I’m following and grasping for the authentic, not the Buddha brilliance you can spit from your internet heart.
Tell me more, message me more, talk to me more in real life. 📷 @lifeinanimage
I don’t want to believe I can be angry or spiral out of control. I don’t want to believe that the tangible and emotional piles surrounding me build anxiety and distress. I don’t want those emotions to be a part of me but guess what, they are.
We move through stages of life that challenge us in different ways.
I’m a practicing immortal not one already.
The ups and downs will feel up and down. The happy and the sad will feel so. The good and the bad will be just that and feel so.
No one is going to tell you to cry and put on a sad face when you’re happy so why would someone tell you to smile when you’re sad?
It takes acceptance to realize where we are and be there.
Meet you where you’re at.
A letter to myself:
I will not crumble for you. I will not give in to the chatter. I will not follow the suppose to rules of living, dating, or loving. I will not fight you when you know. I will lead with heart. I will love fiercely. I will live fearlessly.
Here’s to standing strong and speaking loud.
It’s quite frustrating when people don’t listen to you. When the cries of you, your people, or the public don’t get heard.
I’m disappointed yet again in the way our government places itself completely separate from us. I’m disappointed that they don’t take us seriously. I’m disappointed that our voices were not heard and our demands are not met.
Pulling back the lens to my home front. I’m so proud of the Chicago jury that found Jason Van Dyke guilty and to see the vow to reform the police department beginning to show its face.
I just want to remind everyone to stay strong and loud on your home fronts. To speak even if you don’t think they’re listening. To be unapologetic in the demand to reform this country. Start where you are. You do make a difference.
No I don’t walk around in yoga cloths all day. I don’t only wear ergonomic shoes. I don’t only drink wheatgrass. I don’t live in the mountains or off waterfalls to catch my water for the day. And I don’t live and commune with only yogis or spiritual leaders.
I do wear and eat what makes my heart sing, what helps me be joy and happiness, and helps me be my best self for me and for others.
I break ground every day, I see the seeds I want to flower, meaning I practice every day in every way. This is that yogi, healed boots and all black everything.
I’ve been thinking a lot about how I was talked to as a child and how I would want to talk to my kids.
My dad had a lot of brilliance in the way he raised us. He was an observer, he definitely had concerns and opinions, but ultimately he wanted us to be happy. When I was beginning to dislike the salon industry he said, “you are going to spend most of your waking hours working, so do something you love. I’m just lucky I love teeth.”
So I quit the hair world and left the country.
He never said, go big or go home, you have to finish what you started, if you’re gunna do something go all the way. He simply let us try until we got it right.
There is so much pressure to succeed in everything we try to do. Guess what? That’s not realistic. The sooner we accept that and welcome the lessons we receive from failure, the easier we succeed in what we are meant to do.
It’s ok to just try.