LADIES! . I HAVE FOUND THE KEY TO MAXIMUM SEXUAL ATTRACTIVENESS ON A BUDGET! . According to all ads currently targeted at me, in order to be beautiful women should look as much like new born babies/children as possible. . You must remove every hair on your body. . Get an app to make your selfies look like you have GIANT eyes, and ABSOLUTELY NO NOSE like a fucking Porg. . Babies are mute and don't have dangerous things, like opinions. . So upon realising that I can't afford any of that shit if I want to pay for my house (not food, that is not important, for we must ALL LOSE WEIGHT) I have created a home remedy based on a vague recollection of a youtube video or pinterest post... or something. . I created this face mask from oats (I considered not GF oats, so that I may shit myself, like babies do and being like a baby is sexy). . Now I look like I have vomit all over my face, just like a baby and my nose is hidden. . I also gave my hair a hack job, something small children do. . And so now I am sexy! . Seriously though, nothing makes me more sad than when people assume that because of what I do for a living (@alexpearsonhealthcoaching) that I am judging how they eat, look or live their life. . I mean this is the nicest way, but I really don't care so long as you are living how YOU want to live (unless your hobbies and interests include lying, manipulating and torturing puppies or something). . I think you're fucking perfect now, but if you want to change something that's also amazing. . And my biggest tip for making that last? . Dig deep for why it's important to YOU, not what anyone tells us that we should be. . #health #weightloss #beauty #weightlossculture #dietindustry #newyear #newyearnewme #makeup #bodyacceptance #fatacceptance #nomakeup #bodyimage #dietculture
"I shall tell you a great secret, my friend. Do not wait for the last judgement, it happens every day" . "Life is the sum of all your choices" . . Remembering #Camus today... and the fact that you or someone you love could call shotgun for the last time any day and would any of the bullshit that takes up space in my head, the grudges I hold or the grumbles I have really be that important? . . Thanks for all the brain thinks good Sir.
Smokey gladly being a lil poser over on @alexpearson.healthcoaching His New Years resolution is to be a fashion icon. I'm not a pushy parent but if you don't support me lil mans dreams you are just the worst sort of person. . #dogs #dogsofinstagram #dogsbeingbasic #tellhimhespretty
😂 that'll get ya telt
I gave @royalowltattoo a concept, some words and a few ideas and he totally smashed it out the park and created something mint with a lot of personal meaning to me. . Thanks bud (and thanks #richeyedwards and #rimbaud for the inspiration :) . . . #edrecovery #freedom #recovery #heal #grow #remember #moving on #manics #manicstreetpreachers #richeyjames #richeyjamesedwards #journalforplaguelovers #seasoninhell #aseasoninhell #rimbaudisapunk #arthurrimbaud #arthurrimbaudquotes #imperfect #trashpolkatattoo #trashpolka #cherryblossom #nantwich #tattoo #royalowltattoo #hashtagrecord
Chill time ❤️
Dahell? I WANT A SERVICE DOG DAMMIT! . Does it have a gluten detector nose? . If Anything has gluten in it my dogs will eat it (they also eat it if it doesn't tho), can I take them everywhere with me please? #Repost @celiacqueen with @get_repost ・・・ Does anyone know how to get a Celiac service dog?? I want one!!! ☺️☺️☺️☺️☺️☺️☺️☺️☺️☺️☺️☺️☺️☺️ #glutenfree #coeliaclife #coeliacfoodie #coeliacdisease #coeliac #celiac #celiacdisease #celiacawareness #celiaclife #celiacproblems #celiacfriendly #glutenfreeliving #glutenfreelifestyle #glutenfreefoodie #glutenfreediet #glutenfreeeats #glutenfreeblogger #glutenfrei #glutenfreetravel #celiacdiet
Don't get me wrong sometimes self employment is about some of the things that they tell you on the internet (although #hustle and #grind sound like strip clubs or shit metal bands) . But it's also about being able to choose to work with some amazing people, wear your pyjamas for part of the day or sometimes it's also being able to stop the clock for 15 mins during your work day and let some stinky dogs love you ❤️ and for ALL of that I'm eternally grateful. . I've claimed to be, but nobody is really too busy to give time to those who always have time to give you love, accept your life choices and aren't afraid to show it (preferably without their lipstick on display but I let him off) . I could learn a lot from these little rotters ❤️ (admittedly they don't know any better and eat out of bins/each other's butts but we shall ignore that too). . Normal service shall resume with ridiculous posts soon. #gratitude