It's like watching
Locked in a glass box
Getting smaller and smaller
Your skin pressed up against the glass
Like you wish your stomach could be
As the box closes in
You can't breathe
The oxygen has been released
You gasp for air that doesn't exist
You feel your lungs
Remembering the last time you felt like this
How it seemed to last forever
How no matter how
You rearranged your body
You couldn't fit
In a shrinking box
How no matter how hard
You tried to break the glass
It only shrank around you more
And you lose yourself
Trying to control something
Trying to control the pain
In your bones from the box
Squeezing in on you
And you see your face
In the reflection of the box
And you see something
In your eyes
Because you know this isn't the end
The box eventually gets too small
To encase you forever
So you wait
Until the day the box cracks
As it always does
Glass is fragile
It cannot contain you forever
So the glass cracks
And you're able to breathe again
Able to escape the confines
Of your own mind
Run now child
While you have the chance
I never see myself as capable of being responsible for another life which is why I never even dare to have pets. So whatever I have learnt about responsibility towards others has been through my parents especially my mom; reflecting on the way I have been ‘parented’ and raised.
First of all, Parents should stop seeing their children as society-pleasing-order-following creatures. Your daughter or son is not a project where you are the manager, they are not puppets where you are the puppet master, and surely they are not moulding clay to be shaped the way you want. You should not raise your daughter for marriage but for herself. You should not raise your son to be an alpha male who has been babied too long thus losing touch with the real world and overestimating himself upto a point where he reeks toxic masculinity, but raise your son to be a grounded man. Raise a man, not an insecured little boy who puts others down to feel good about himself.
Simply put, if you cannot bring up children for themselves but only to fulfill all that you lack in your life, all that you never could be and all that the society deems ‘perfect’ then don’t bring them into this world at all.
In the battles to be what our parents want us to be, and what society demands that we be; we lose the ultimate war which is to be humane, compassionate and empathetic. The world, after all, doesn’t need any more humans, it needs more humanity.
First love is innocent, it's pious,it's unnoticed, it just happens you don't even realize it. And that feeling is irreproachable.
What's even awesome is wanting to see your love happy in any circumstance, wanting to shower 'em with all your tender warmth and affection.
Love has this power to change your life in a way you can't even imagine, it has the ability to change YOU. .
First love,first date,first hug,first kiss,first connection that you develop together...first secrets that you share with each other is way too astonishing.
BUT WHAT'S WORST PART ABOUT FIRST LOVE IS that it's always hard to pass over it...
It's true when people say that first love is hard to forget.
I felt that healing comes with time and if you try to pretend everything is okay it'll bring peace but that dirty game of chess people play has nothing to do with your words, they'll pretend they know everything about you when they don't and they'll judge you for being lonely, for being too sensitive, for not sharing the right things at the wrong time just because their two big ears were expecting to hear something else but they can't produce enough cochlea to hear what I really say.
If that lonely highway and a handful of memories makes me a murderer, then I'm far away from the games your head play that humiliate my very existence, no doubt I will crash the cars over your expectations every night, if you want to eat anything I'll give you an apple but if you force me to stay outside in that cold sick temperature that freeze every pour of my skin; I'm sorry I won't act like you want me to, If I yell for water you tie me up and ask, "Tell me where it hurts" and I'll tell you not a mere cut on my skin and a pinch of salt on it can make you any less than a monster who ask, "where it hurts" when my whole heart is ripped apart and burned in the ashes of your touch,
you swing the ceilings of torture and tell me, I'm wrong when you set that radio on highest frequency who tuned dark punk songs that ruptured my ear drum.
I'm scared for when people light up a cigarette ,'cause that cigarette burns on my skin makes me remember for what you did and made me to, that knife held against my neck evaporated every ounce of blood so you let me go that it's useless because I won't bleed? I groaned so badly lying on that cold floor and you crushed me against your feet, you made me write poems with blood, on the name of love when my words were screaming, "Let her go" but now as it's over I hear myself scream every night I sit in that room which has one window and a rocking chair that swirls like dwelling past scenarios in which you acted like human, with a touch of monster. Now, Sun shines every morning lightning those cracks on my skin, nourishing my blood, and I understood, "maybe you were a sinner for Goodluck" but next time if you ask me, "What if you die here?" I'll kill you
H E A L I N G 🧘🏻♀️🖤
If I could show a poem to my younger self, this would be it.
As young people, we have this giant fear of being too much, too weird, etc.
We hide the things that make us wonderful in favor of fitting in.
But no more! Let us all wrap our arms around ourselves and remember that we ARE weird, and that’s what makes us interesting, and that no amount of weirdness makes us unworthy of love.
It's been almost a week now since I woke up and decided that I'm ready to make my dreams a reality.
Every day since then my heart has carried such a pure and hopeful energy.
It is as if I am high off of love, excitement and ambition.
This feeling, this energy, it is all quite new to me. Never in my life have I felt this much positivity pulsing through my veins, without even the slightest trickle of doubt.
I am overflowing with gratitude from the abundance of love and support I have received.
It is one thing to believe in yourself, but the backing of others has been reassuring since the solidifying of my decision.
The Universe has spoken.
I am ready to chase my dreams. *This picture was taken after attempting to take a handstand picture, and realizing that I just couldn't do it this morning. So deep breathing, while kinda sorta posed. 😂*