Things I’ve learnt this week: Do not watch The Handmaid’s Tale when you have had a miscarriage, or when experiencing pregnancy after loss and feeling a bit wobbly. There’s blood - a lot of it - during a pregnancy, and it’s massively triggering if you have ptsd or any kind of trauma from experiencing something similar. At every moment of this pregnancy blood could be in our future, and that’s our worst nightmare come true... again. (Not to trivialise any of the very real nightmares the world is experiencing currently, or the fact we’re all heading to hell in a handcart if important people don’t start behaving with a bit of sodding humanity pretty pronto). While we’re at it, don’t watch The Light Between Oceans on your own, because that’s a pregnancy loss, or baby loss survivor’s world of grief brought to the surface. And don’t listen to an audiobook where a character has a daughter named Pearl, and you have to hear your own lost daughter’s name repeated about 20 times on your commute into work. So... yeah, that’s where I’m at. #pregnantafterloss#itsafuckingnightmare#andawondrousthingtoo#allthefeels#ptsd#recurrentpregnancyloss#triggerwarning
Day 26 🍊 🍊
She doesn't know how to control her thoughts any more.
Lately she doesn't even remember the last thing she ate, or watched on TV.
Some days she feels so lost, like she's been here before but something just doesn't click.
She's been going through a never ending maze and this maze is really getting boring.
She can't handle this puzzle any longer. She keeps hearing "you're getting stronger" but she just cannot believe it.
So she bothers not to push herself but to give up she can't think of a reason to keep going.
She gives up.
Pulls out a little sharp silver thing.
She gave up.
She grazed that little silver thing across her arm with no hesitation.
She just couldn't do it.
I have to warn you that I have a very harsh, dark sense of humour! I use very harsh language when I talk to people and I am not really politically correct! If you take me to seriously we won’t get along! I’ll call you a fag and say nice tits! I attack liberals and snow flakes very hard! Doesn’t mean I hate you or I wanna rape you if you can’t take a joke then unfollow me! Ill post shit that you may find offensive but hey that’s who I am! I’ll make fun of you and troll the fuck out of you! I expect it back, it’s only fair! I don’t take life to seriously and I especially don’t take the internet seriously. I can be an asshole at times but don’t take it too personal, I still loves ya! There you’ve been warned fuckers! Let the games begin and time to wean out the weak bitches!🤣🤣🤣 #nofilter#triggerwarning#nosnowflakes#yolo#liberaltears
The battle for the mind is the greatest battle a person will ever have to fight, especially a Christian. While you're in the world, the enemy will seduce you with sin to keep you, but when you give your life to Christ, he fights you through temptation to get you back.
Once saved you quickly learn that what you used to call fun, was actually a weapon but not a weapon that produced pain, but pleasure.
While you was laughing and having a good-old time in sin, the enemy was actually building strongholds in your mind, addictions and habits.
You no longer find yourself laughing or enjoying yourself but instead, struggling with the ugly face of temptation.
The Bible tells us that every man is tempted when he is drawn away by his own lust and desires (James 1:14). Think about it, if we never enjoyed it, we can't be drawn away by it, so that means the war didn't start once we got saved, it started once we started saying yes to the things we should've been saying no to. The enemy is never out to please you, he's out to trap you! He's not out to fulfill you, he's out to fool you! His pleasures are apart of his plan, not yours! That's why we should never treat sin as a "simple thing" because it's not nor should we try to fight it on our own - it's a spiritual war to which we must use spiritual weapons - prayer, fasting, standing on the Word, and whatever else God tells you to do in order to fight your good fight of faith. And you must always have a made-up mind, for without it you won't use your spiritual weapons effectively.
God loves you!
Give your life to Christ
Say Lord I confess my sins, and I make You my Lord and Savior.
When I first told my mom about my depression, she yelled at me. She told me I had no right to be depressed. She screamed that I had everything most people wanted. And I just cried back that I didn’t want this, I didn’t understand it. She never believed I was depressed because I could never explain to her why. I couldn’t find the words to tell her that everytime I look in the mirror I want to cry. I couldn’t tell her that everytime someone tells me “I love you” I wait for the “but”. I couldn’t tell her that no matter how hard I try, I just feel empty. So we faught for hours over my “depression”. Her constant screaming that I just wanted attention and wanted sympathy began to carve itself in my skin. She watched me cry and cry because I didn’t know what else to do. That was the day I realized when people ask you what’s wrong, they don’t really care for the real answer.