jet lagged and re-reading possibly the most important book I’ve ever read. Instead of changing my perception about my place as a gay man in a straight person’s world it gave me the understanding of why I struggle deeply and daily with Rage Against The Machine. I uncovered memories I hadn’t considered in decades reading this book - understanding my own (sometimes continued) participation in homophobia directed towards me. My complicity. A fascinating, MUST READ. #TheVelvetRage 😡 🏳️🌈
Het is Rotterdam Pride van 27-30 september. We hebben een paar (recent verschenen) boeken verzameld waar LGBT personages voorkomen.
📖Een klein leven – Hanya Yanagihara
Vertaling: Josephine Ruitenberg en Kitty Pouwels
Originele titel: A Little Life
'Een fascinerende leeservaring, ook op niveaus waarvan je niet wist dat ze bestonden. Het huilen hoort erbij.' -De Groene Amsterdammer
📖Lanoye 60, groepsportret met brilletje -Tom Lanoye
Lanoye 60. Groepsportret met brilletje is een feestboek ter ere van de zestigste verjaardag van Tom Lanoye, die vanaf de jaren tachtig de hemels bestormde met zijn romans, gedichten, toneelstukken, satirische teksten en essays.
📖The Velvet Rage – Alan Downs,PhD
Da Capo Press
The Velvet Rage is een krachtig boek dat de publieke opinie over homocultuur al heeft veranderd en heeft geholpen de identiteit van een hele generatie homoseksuele mannen vorm te geven.
📖My solo exchange Diary volume 1 – Nagata Kabi
Originele titel: Hitori Konan Nikki vol.1
Dit vervolg op My Lesbian Experience With Loneliness volgt de auteurs zoektocht naar zelfacceptatie en liefde.
📖 Geschiedenis van geweld- Édouard Louis
Vertaling: Reintje Ghoos en Jan Pieter van der Serre
De Bezige Bij
Originele titel: Histoire de la violence
Geschiedenis van geweld is een nietsontziende roman over de nacht waarin Édouard Louis op gruwelijke wijze werd aangevallen. Dit boek vertelt het verhaal van die nacht en probeert de oorzaken en consequenties van het fenomeen geweld te doorgronden. .
#thevelvetrage#alandowns get this book if you hadn't already gotten it. I've said this before I'm sure, but it is a very well written insightful read. Wether you are a part of the #lgbtq community or not, we can all learn a thing or two from this book.
I've played piano for Gabby for over a year now. She's taken me to Glastonbury, toured the U.K. & Japan. But when she agreed to be a surprise guest on my album launch, it meant the world to me!
FULL LEGNTH VIDEO COMING SOON with Gabby, piano & strings. •
Una delle cose che più mi piacciono di Luca è che non desidera cambiarmi. Ma la cosa bella è che insieme stiamo già cambiando.
Non abbiamo nessuna certezza di quel che sarà domani eppure ora dopo ora, giorno dopo giorno ci prepariamo a diventare quel che saremo. Continueremo a essere Luca e Alessandro ma saremo diversi perché “se due sistemi interagiscono tra loro per un certo periodo di tempo e poi vengono separati, non possono più essere descritti come due sistemi distinti ma in qualche modo diventano un unico sistema”. #itgetsbetter 🏳️🌈 #gaylove#loveislove#thevelvetrage
“When we are vulnerable to invalidation we tend to look for it in places it doesn’t exist. Because we are so vulnerable to shame, and because it’s triggered so easy within us, our lives have become solely focused on avoiding shame and seeking validation. Almost everything becomes either an a avoidance strategy or invitation for validation.” - Alan Downs Ph.d
This wknd I read this passage in a book titled, “The Velvet Rage”. It stood out bc it made me realize, how many times we’ve done things to avoid shame. How many times have we sought validation from others? Whether it be our peers, love interests and sometimes even more so by our own flesh and blood. Unfortunately, we do it all the time. To this end, this wknd, as a part of my on-going purge, I found a 23-y.o. letter from a now distant relative that brought me to tears. The tears came from reading the first part of it where it expressed a deep unconditional love for me. It wasn’t until I read further that this love was in fact conditional, based on me forsaking my authentic self (like so many other closeted men in ATL had done before me). You see, this letter was written in response to my “coming out” letter. I vaguely remember the full details of it back then, but reading it now as a mature man; a man with way more life experiences and an understanding of the world we live, ppl, places and things outside of my then, limited worldly exposure, living in what now seemed like the little southern city of Atlanta. Things have since changed in the A. It has now (post ‘96 Olympics), grown in many areas. Its also now known as one of the black gay mecca’s in NA (how ironic). As I continued reading it, I became filled with emotions ranging from anger, sadness and even rage at times. It evoked all of these emotions in me because it came from such a judgmental place masked with love. It came from a toxic place that I needed to remove myself from-fast (and I did)! It came from a place of ignorance. It came from a place where love couldn’t exist. It came from selfishness and ego. Reading this book, stumbling across the letter and a few other things happening simultaneously, gives me understanding.
The Velvet Rage: Overcoming the Pain of Growing Up Gay in a Straight Man’s World by Alan Downs
It was an interesting and difficult read at times but it was well worth it. “Always seek to allow others space to be imperfect.”
This Monday 16th July @peteleekeys is doing an album launch gig for #thevelvetrage . I think there are still some tickets left. Come see these beautiful people play some lush music, with some extra special guests! I don’t think it’ll be as cold as the last gig we did together ❄️ ⛄️ 📷 @davehamblett
"There are basically two ways in which we may resolve the identity crisis. One is to retreat into a permanent denial of our sexual preference, often referred to as "foreclosure". When a man forecloses on admitting a gay, he gives up striving for authenticity. Of course, the other way to resolve this crisis of identity is to admit to our being gay and to make the choice to be openly gay. As perhaps you know, neither choice is completely easy. But peace of mind and being at peace with oneself doesn't come from foreclosure. No matter how hard it might be to openly gay, it is the path toward being authentic", from page 63 on the book, The Velvet Rage: Overcoming the Pain of Growing Up Gay in a Straight Man's World, by Alan Downs.
This book has speared through my heart with the answers to all the identity-related questions that I've been constantly asking myself in my life. Please read this book if you're still struggling with your identity or having a problem with your relationship. I really recommend this book to anyone struggling with own identity or relationship; This book will help you find answers to all your questions.
That "pride won't hide" was on the cotton bag from UbanOutfitters.
THE VELVET RAGE.
as a gay man, if i were to offer any advice to my homosexual brothers, it would be to read this book. beyond important, beyond poignant, beyond unearthing and at times heartbreaking. if it doesn’t change your life, it will change the way you look at your past.
author Alan Downs @velvetread 🙌🏽
Delighted to receive my copy of @peteleekeys’s debut album ‘The Velvet Rage’. My first credit as a producer - a role that, in this case, involved sitting in an idyllic studio in Wales for a week and listening to my favourite musicians play some of the most beautiful, heartfelt and sincere music I’ve heard. What a joy! So grateful to Pete for asking me to be involved, to @josharcoleo @alexmunkmusic @huwfoster @alifine @amikaquartet @simviolin @violinrich for playing so beautifully and to @superstaralex90 for doing such an astonishing job on the engineering and mixing. Album is out 29th June on @ubuntumusic. Album launch gig 16th July at @pizzaexpresslive, Holborn - be there! #PeteLee#TheVelvetRage#UbuntuMusic#UKJazz#NewMusic#AlbumArt#AlbumCover#NoFilter
Holiday reading. Uncanny and revealing in its eloquence at laying out bare my life growing up, feeling different by not knowing quite why. Being shamed by everyone else for being different, it had/has lasting ramifications on my mental health, even to this day.
Lol look how nice!
Someone painted my portrait!
You can just call me... “Harley”
I’m done playing around with this shit.
Fuck all y’all haters.
I don’t need you, I never needed you.
You are nothing.
I’m a grown being with the right to say that I didn’t want this form in the first place. If I could I would choose no form.
My astral self, the true me, is so very beautiful, She is far more captivating and desirable then any supermodel or porn star you have ever seen, and worlds more proper than even the most high class executives. Her sheer beauty would fucking blind you all, make men impotent, and women lose all self worth and esteem, seeing as they could never attain her beauty and grace.
For those loser men, you fucking naysayers: “I’m more of a man then you’ll ever be... And more of a woman then you’ll ever get.”
And to any woman who dare tell me I’m wrong in some way, “Don’t be fucking mad because yo man wanna fucking have my babies, and that I look far more attractive then you do with yo fuckin fake ass face all caked on.” What a waste of such gifts... It devastates me all I cannot fucking do. Fuck this world.
It is my mission.
To bring peace and love and see to it that all are accepted and understood and welcome, no matter what!
I love you all unending.
You are the reason I am still here.
Have a blessed day!
Harley, O U T.