When you lose someone you love, grief puts a weight on your body like you've never known. The burden breaks your spirit. It rips you up. Shreds your soul. And drowns your heart. It rains when the sun shines. And even the worst nightmare pales in comparison to the emptiness of waking life. The waves keep coming and I feel like I'm drowning. But sometimes, between the waves, I feel peace, and I see the sun shining, and I feel the love that I thought was gone with him. I feel his spirit working in me, giving breath to this new life without him. A breath of the cold autumn air fills me. My lungs expand filling me with new hope. I exhale with purpose, determination, and peace. I open my eyes. The golden colors of the trees feed my creative hunger. My grief suppressed my cure. My grief tricked me into thinking that color and art and creativity couldn't help me heal. I am healing. I am not ok. But I will be. Flowers help. He speaks to me through them. He creates with me in the garden. He loves me though he's gone. A touch of Grampa in every bloom. Happy Thanksgiving to my sweetest angel. ❤❤❤❤ I made this for my Grandfather the day before Thanksgiving. I gave it to him that evening. By Thanksgiving morning the rain had forced the lilys to droop heavily. Color still filled their velvety petals and life still flowed through their stems. But the weight of the rain had injured his flowers. Life is still happening around me. And I still have a beating heart. But my soul is heavy. My heart is broken. I've never felt so much like a flower. ❤❤❤❤ #Thanksgiving#thanksgivingflowers#oregongirl#floralartist#floraldesign#flowers#art#bouquet#grief#healing#heartache#floraldesigninstitute#soontobestudent#bigdreams#love#angels#grandpa#myheart#homedecor#designer
Monday after a long weekend can be tough. I find it helpful to think about what I am looking forward to this week. It can be small things like my favorite cup of tea before work, or an episode of a funny tv show, or the chance to experiment with flowers and try something new. What are some small things you are looking forward to this week?