"And four years of pre-med, four years of med school and tonnes of unpaid loans have made me realise one thing .... I don't know jack"
As a first-year junior doctor, there isn't usually all that much decision-making actually resting on my shoulders. Hell, a good 75% of what I do most days is paperwork
But at night? At night the senior doctors in the specialties I cover are at home (or in theatre). They'll answer the phone if needed, but rarely will they actually be physically there to guide you
So at night, your resident babyfaced interns really are running the hospital
And they have to stick together
Last night, the intern covering the other half of the surgical specialties was sitting behind me, and answered the phone. He just suddenly stopped talking. He'd already been frantically dealing with one emergency (a saddle PE!), when another was dropped in his lap
I picked up both files, and asked him which one he wanted me to deal with. The poor guy almost cried, but after that he was back in the zone. Between us and the good folks in the ICU, both patients were doing fine when my shift ended
This is a great job, but it can be f**king terrifying. We've got to have each other's backs (Apparently I do non-snarky posts!) #friendship#friend#goals#doctor#doctors#medicine#junior#baby#scary#clueless