I’m more than content being a strong, independent single woman the majority of the time. I can be completely selfish and choose who I do and don’t want to hang out with. I can watch whatever I want on the TV without any arguments, and spend the whole weekend in pajamas eating pizza if I want to, the list is as long as I want it to be.
However, there are occasions when I wish I were more of a couple than a single, and this time of year is one of them. I think Christmas hits us all when we’re on our own, and of course, some people are not into the festivities at all so they are happy to disappear for a few days. But, I’m a social butterfly and love parties and celebrations, mostly these are fun when you know there are other single people there too, it can feel like a special gang that you are part of. Then some people seem to only mix with couples and these are the events I’d rather avoid. Yes, I’ll more than likely know other people but there is no one to help me escape the couple clutches and the duller than dull conversations I may be drawn into with a ‘hey, Cat, come see who I’ve found over here’ for me to mutter my excuses and totter away as fast as my party shoes will let me.
Buying a Christmas tree and squishing it into my car is something else that irks me and my single status. Then the dragging it up the stairs swearing and into to my flat, balancing it on my knee, chair, wall, wherever, whilst I try to squeeze it into one of those tree holders without it falling down and destroying half of my living room before there’s even a bauble in place.
So if you do visit a singleton over the holiday season, please be sure to compliment their Christmas tree now you know the trouble we go through to put it there.
Then kiss them hard under the mistletoe. •
I met the guitarist at Warren Street tube station, he didn’t work far away and was only a few stops on the tube for me. I waited outside feeling nervous, and a little fragile. I couldn’t see him so I texted to say where I was, it turned out that he was standing outside of the other exit. He walked around and we smiled and hugged, then suggested we head to the closest Pret a Manger.
Once we’d decided on sandwiches and coffee and found a table to sit at, he asked, “how are you?” In reality a bit shaky, and i couldn’t pretend to act as though I’d seen him the week before and feeling defiant I replied “nope, you talk”, He looked at me wide-eyed “You want to do this now?” “Yes”. He shuffled around in his seat a bit, “Erm, well an ex got in touch and wanted to get back together, we talked a bit and I got all confused about you and what I did or didn’t want and then felt it was easier to ignore everyone, disappear and hope it would all go away”
That made me feel a bit sick. I took a deep breath, “So are you back with her?” ‘ “no”
Bluntly I blurted out, “I had two friends die in the past six days, one this morning, life is short, what do you want?”. “Oh god, I’m so sorry” “Would you like to go out this week with me?” he said gently.
I sighed (wondering if this was a stupid idea) “Sure, Friday? But don’t let me down” “I won’t”. We then chatted about other stuff that had been happening in the past few weeks then he needed to get back to work, we stood up and he said “I really want to kiss you”
Me too, probably because I wanted someone to hold and comfort me when I felt so beaten up and also because I felt pathetically happy that we were going to see each other again. We had a little kiss in Pret before walking together to the tube. Hugged again and we both went our separate ways. •
How You Like It In Bed, According To Your Sign
SARA COUGHLIN @refinery29 @refinery29uk
When it comes to sex, you may pride yourself on knowing exactly what you want and like. But that doesn't mean there's no space to broaden your horizons and switch things up now and again. Whether you're selecting a sex toy, testing a sex position, or just cuddling, it can't hurt to mix it up — and what's a better source of inspiration than the stars?
Each sign has slightly different likes and dislikes and that absolutely applies to the bedroom. From chatty Geminis to generous Libras, these well-known astrological identities come through in how we express ourselves sexually. And, even if you've never identified with your sign, there's no reason to think something that works for others who share it won't work for you.
Ahead, discover what the stars have to say about your bedroom game.
If you find that your sun sign's style just isn't you, be sure to read for your Venus and Mars signs, too. The former rules your love life, so it may align with your bedroom persona if you're in a relationship, while the latter rules all things physical (and you can do the math there). I’m checking out mine:
You like it: Exploratory. The expansive sun, your ruler, urges you and your fellow Lionesses to pursue your pleasure wherever it takes you. If it feels good, find more of it — that's the Leo way.
We recommend: Mutual masturbation. This bold form of intimacy breaks down any remaining barriers between you and partner as you explore exactly how to make each other feel good. Besides, when have you ever shied away from asking for exactly what you want?
What does yours say?
#friday#friyay#zodiac#horoscope#astrology#leo#starsigns#datingover40#olderwomenyoungermen#writerscommunity#writersofinstagram#onlinedating#datingapp#coffeedate#firstdate#amwriting#mumwriter#newwriter#romance#romancebooks#tiemeup#nails#rednails#red#dating#singlegirl#curvygirl#datingtips#nonfiction#memoir @tinder @bumble @bumble_uk @happn_app
Around the same time I’d also connected with a Kiwi ex-rugby player (37) who lived in Edinburgh. He had been in a pub in Marylebone when we’d matched, and was now back in Scotland. He travelled a lot and wasn’t going to be in London for weeks so we swapped numbers and whatsapped, which very quickly nosedived into sexting, and then to phone sex. This was extremely filthy and lots of fun. We would send photos to each other at all times of the day, me with my hands in my knickers and tit shots, him sending me cock pics. His New Zealand accent was still strong even after living here for a long time. We would call or text each other at random times and if we caught each other we’d just go for it, it was really hot and went on for about six weeks.
Finally, this Thursday the Kiwi was going to be in London via Berlin before going back to Edinburgh so we arranged to meet after I’d finished at the theatre at 1am and were literally going back to mine to fuck. I met him at Tottenham Court Road station, looked around, saw a large man across the road wearing a sports jacket, crap, I didn’t fancy him one bit. •
#sexting#datingover40#onlinedating#datingapp#dirtytalk#rugby#kiwi#sex#firstdate#olderwomenyoungermen#phonesex#writerscommunity#mumwriter#singlemum#newwriter#nonfiction#memoir#romance#romancebooks#writersofinstagram#bookstagram#writing#amwriting#curvygirl#dating#london#single#londondating @bumble @bumble_uk @tinder @happn_app @eharmonyuk @eharmony @plentyoffish
It’s awful weather today and so dark isn’t it?! 😬
I’ve been cheering myself up working with the lovely @mua_bethanylouise
I’m so useless when it comes to doing my own make-up! My Nanna Jean doesn’t wear it so I was never introduced to it when I was younger.
I love having my face done for special events but I struggle with that day-to-day look.
Most days I wear none and I’m really comfortable with that. I can go to the shop with nothing on my face and I never wear any at weekends because I’m on the radio no one can see me.
That said sometimes I wish I’d make more of a effort and it can make me feel better if I look a little more ‘alive’ 😂
It’s hard for busy mums to achieve a nice look that doesn’t take forever and doesn’t look too over the top.
Bethany is a make-up artist and today we’ve been filming a video of her step to step guide on how to look good for the days in ten minutes with minimal fuss using just a few great products 🙌🙌🙌
The blog post and video will be up next week.
I’d love to hear about your relationship with make-up. Are you like me and you don’t really wear any? Or do you love it and won’t go out without your face done? Share your stories and any fave products or top tips 💕
The cameraman (36) came next and gave great message. Long chats, smart topics, he was funny and had perfect punctuation. This almost confused me into thinking he was the guitarist in disguise as they both wrote in such a similar style. We were both busy but managed to squeeze in a date for the Friday, he suggested a bar in the city and to meet at St Paul’s.
St Paul’s tube station is a labyrinth with exits everywhere, after some initial confusion we found each other. He was tall, slim, with sharp features. I didn’t fancy him at all. We walked to the bar he’d suggested but it was closed for a private party. I knew somewhere else nearby that I’d been to before so rather than wandering the streets to find a place I took him straight there. I’d only been before on a Saturday morning, weekends in the city are notoriously dead and the bar had been quiet and perfect for meeting a friend for brunch, however a midweek evening was completely different. Loud, lively and full of suited city workers.
He wasn’t really a drinker and only had two rums during the whole evening, we didn’t eat and I had several glasses of wine in quick succession. I’d decided that If I kept drinking perhaps I would begin to find him attractive. I had really enjoyed the messages he’d written so maybe it wasn’t all about looks I tried telling myself. This in turn just made me into a lairy drunk woman.
We walked to the tube, he snogged me going down on the escalator, on the platform and then on the tube until my stop. We said goodbye and that we’d text, a couple of days later he did, to say he didn’t want to meet again. •
#firstdate#cameraman#justnotintoyou#winedate#firstdate#stpauls#snog#kisses#datingover40#wine#olderwomenyoungermen#onlinedating#datingapp#messages#writing#amwriting#writersofinstagram#writerscommunity#romance#romancebooks#mumwriter#newwriter#dating#single#curvygirl#youwinsomeyoulosesome @tinder @bumble @happn_app #london#girlswhowearglasses
Why do you use Instagram? I set up this account to focus on my writing, to meet other writers and mums, and to put my writing goals out into the world.
But I sometimes struggle with it. I can’t separate my writing from every other part of my life (clearly!) and so don’t know how to build this account in an authentic way that remains fun. And I don’t know how some of you guys manage to post so many gorgeous pics of you writing. It’s just day in day out sofa and toy-mess on my camera roll 😱
I need a re-think of how to do this thing properly, but in the meantime I’m so so curious to know what other people get out of the gram! Is it followers? Friends? Profile raising? Do you share a mish-mash or interests or keep it strictly focused? Do you know what your followers love about you?
It’s the weekend, possibilities can be endless... but what foods to woo your potential partner..? 🍓🍒🍌🥑 Food to complement your sex drive – anything goes!
Let’s start with the original question. What should we be eating to ensure that we are “ready to roll”?! To be honest, anything goes. A healthy and balanced diet is going to give you the energy and nutrients you need for a bit of (in the words of my father) ‘rumpy pumpy’. Everyone raves about zinc, a mineral which is essential for the production of both male and female sex hormones and found at high levels in meat, whole grains, beans, nuts, seeds and shell fish (i.e., all the usual culprits). Vitamin E, which is found is both animal and vegetable fats, has also been flagged as helping to optimize blood flow to the (cough) nether regions.
So is there anything which should be avoided? It really depends on you. Some people struggle with certain carbohydrates which can cause the sensation of bloating (and you feeling a bit like a snake that’s just swallowed a mouse, as opposed to a lean, mean, slinky sex goddess). So, you may want to avoid lashings of pasta and bread. Alcohol in moderate quantities can help you to relax and boost your “mojo,” but you don’t want to drink so much that you are comatose!
More at: 50 Shades of Sexy Food to Get You in the Mood http://inspirelle.com/no-nonsense-nutritionist-does-50-shades-of-sexy-food/ via @inspirelle
There is no stronger love than that of a mother and her child. From the moment that baby is placed in the mother's arms, she will love it unconditionally even through the hardest of times.
This print is available through my Etsy shop. Please click link in bio.
It’s a red lipstick kinda day
The history of red lipstick is a winding tale of power, death, rebellion, and bawdiness. Some smeared it on despite the stigma, while others literally poisoned themselves with toxic lipstick formulas in order to look beautiful. Powerful women used it to assert their space, and others used it to build courage and flirt with the idea of coming out of their boxes.
Lipstick has inspired women like Dita Von Teese to assert, "Heels and red lipstick will put the fear of God into people," and was the driving force behind Coco Chanel's comment, "If you're sad, add more lipstick and attack." Wearing a bold red can give a feeling of power, making one feel like a different version of themselves.
The beauty-minded public has had a long love affair with red lipstick, as it made its way from Cleopatra's vanity to giving Queen Elizabeth I her "kiss of death," leaping from Marilyn Monroe's flirty smirk to your mom's lips when she swiped it on in the mirror each morning. From murder, to prostitution, to witchcraft accusations, the history of red lipstick has a sexy past that's 5,000 years deep. •
Slowly slowly catchy monkey.
But quickly quickly catchy hand, foot and mouth virus, apparently, so that’s been a hilarious weekend of looking like a plague victim. I’ve spared you the selfie and you are absolutely welcome.
However, I still wrote! And yes, 80% of what I wrote was adverbs and trying to describe a man’s ‘lightly muscled body’ without sounding like an absolute douche, but hey. We do what we gotta do.
She said, muscularly.
My new blog is finally live 🙌🙌
I’ve been wanting to do this for so long but it seems one thing or another got in the way.
I’ve also been petrified about putting myself out there and going for it but not trying is a bigger fail than trying and it not working right?
Im going to be blogging about real life, bring a mum, fitness and all that jazz whilst keeping it 100 per cent real.
A massive thank you to Michael from @cleverpigweb who created the beautiful design and put it together. I cannot recommend him enough if you’re looking for someone to design you a website.
@jaspreet5odhi who has illustrated it perfectly, she’s super talented and great to work with.
Finally some really special friends who’ve supported me and given me the confidence to do this...Catherine @be_balanceduk @lydiaathey and @juliecamm who are some of the worlds best women 💕
Not forgetting Mr P my gorgeous husband and kids who inspire me every day.
I’d love you to join me on my new adventure @mumontheradio give us a follow and get involved.
First blog is up and it’s a bit of a serious one 😮 Anxiety and low self-esteem.
Hopefully it’s relatable to many and reminds us all that we are never alone, it’s never just “you”.
Day 5 of NaNo and I’m thinking about the pressure we put on ourselves to get things ‘right’.
I did this mermaid pic for my toddler daughter to do glueing and sticking, and had to ACTUALLY sit on my hands to stop her from sticking bits in the wrong place. 😱 My drive for perfection has always been a pain in the bloody arse.
But this NaNo is really helping me to get over myself. I can’t do everything, I can’t be an utterly amazing parent and keep a beautiful house and write 5,000 words a day and make totally healthy food choices. I just can’t and there’s no need to feel like I - or any of us - should.
Today I’ve ignored housework. I cut it fine to pick up my daughter from nursery on time. My low-carb diet has consisted exclusively of bits of ready-to-eat chicken and chocolate lebkuchen and wine. My novel isn’t a work of literary genius.
But it’s happening, slowly, around the rest of my life, and it’s making me quietly happy. Here’s to slowly unfolding stories, on paper and off, and imperfect loveliness.
Day one of #nanowrimo and I eked out 2769 words. Day two and I have spent every minute gallivanting around soft-play, parks, museums and cafes with my little ladies. Quite frankly I’ll be impressed if I manage 20 words today, but I’ll consider that a day well spent! I’m still feeling really excited about it 😃
Also, can this autumn sunshine stay forever please? I’m so in my happy place - jumpers and boots and sun, oh my!
#amwritingmystery#nanowrimo2018#writersofinstagram#writinglife#autumn 🍁 #mumwriter#aspiringauthors