TRIGGER WARNING: “I come from a respectable, upper middle class family. On the outside we look perfect, but the story inside the house is very different. My mom has always been violent by nature. I have a twin sister & a younger sister & all of us have borne the brunt of this violence since we were kids–both verbal & physical.
Our mom suffers from depression. During her hysterical mood swings, things are thrown at us. Once she got so angry she threw a hot pressure cooker & my sister got hurt! Another time when I didn’t hang some clothes to dry the way she wanted, she threw a knife at me. I got cut & started bleeding.
But there are moments when she behaves like a mom should–sweet & caring. Those are very rare. Our society puts parents on a pedestal & teaches kids to glorify them–speaking out against them is a taboo. It was very hard for us to know that all of this was wrong.
We thought it was normal for a parent to hit their child. Even a counselor told us to see it from her perspective, saying, ‘After all she’s your mom.’ And our dad is usually abroad for work, but even when he’s home, he turns a blind eye. He’s not neglectful, but he gets stuck between the fights.
All of this started taking a toll on me & when I was in college, my grades were affected. I was debarred in my first year. I was depressed & I’d spend hours crying, thinking, ‘Why is this happening?’ Nobody took us seriously when we spoke about parental violence. But my sisters & I found solace in each other–we support & protect one another.
Our mom is the way she is because of a traumatic, childhood experience. We’re trying to break that cycle of mistreatment by teaching ourselves to be kind. It could have made us cynical, but it’s only taught us to be empathetic towards others. We know that someday, when we have a family of our own–we’ll shower them with love & understanding.
We’re in a better place now. My sisters have done their Masters & I have a great job. We’ve had the chance to move out, but chose not to abandon our mom. Instead we try & coexist & stand firm against any sign of violence. I’ve already forgiven her & I’ve vowed to never say, ‘I am this way because of my mom.’”
Менее чем через две недели настанет новый год и хочется подвести итоги (да снова Сёмк, ну уж очень крутые получились фотки ❤️) Это был очередной очень увлекательный и насыщенный год. И я люблю,когда жизнь бьёт ключом⛲🔑🔧🗝️ иногда и монтировочным 🤣
Посмотрев список желаний на этот год, я могу сказать,что получилась бОльшая часть,но и не все желания в этом списке были мои (ну вы понимаете, есть такие идеи иногда, когда к тебе привязываются общепринятые ,а не твои). Начну с самого неожиданного, но самого долгожданного- это был отпуск с сыном! И пусть кто-то меня сейчас осудит, но этот отпуск ждала давно (до этого последний раз был в 2012 ещё с мамой и сестрой!) Две недели полного единения с ребенком, море, солнце 🏊) и это был из пунктов ✔️ Так же один мини тур получился в Белгород этой осенью. Наконец то увиделись с родственниками,с которыми тоже лет пять не виделись ✔️ При этом я работаю пять дней в неделю, но почти весь день посвящаю ребенку ✔️ (хотите узнать как выглядит моя рабочая неделя/день?) Поменяла машине масло вовремя (впервые)✔️ Раз в месяц устраиваю день красоты по полной✔️ Купила огромную новогоднюю ёлку в потолок домой ✔️ Отрастила волосы по поясницу ✔️ Из того что не получилось:
✖️ Не похудела
✖️ Не доделала ремонт, а точнее большую часть, вообще не доделала. Мебели по прежнему нет. Но скоро будет готов дизайн проект.
✖️ Не сходила к зубному и косметологу
✖️ Не сходила на балет/оперу/каток
Хочу до конца года составить истинный список желаний и расставить цели ❇️ Вообще конечно приятных моментов много и побед в этом году тоже, но все не расскажешь. Молчу про достижения Сёмк и все что с ним связано, потому что это по моему и так очевидно 😉
У кого какие были планы? Что получилось?
To be real, moms don't get many candid shots of them and their children that are always good, flattering shots. It's either blurry, very unflattering, or baby messes up photo last minute lol it's always something. While this photo isn't very flattering, it's not horrendous of me and I just LOVE the memory. Family camp sister Raquel put together for the church, baby was not feeling the water, but got calm with momma and decided to lay on her chest as he played with the water with his cute little hand. I was so enjoying him being calm in my arms. 🥰😍🤗💙 Thank you to Mochi for being the other paparazzi at church. #ThrowbackTuesday#MomLife#MommasBoy#Motherhood#MotherAndSon#BoyMom#BabyBoy#BabyGram#InstaBaby#InstaMom#FirstTimeMom
Her Garden Gym is now closed to clients over the Christmas period so I can spend some quality time with my family and children home from university. Training doesn’t stop though, instead it means more family fitness sessions as well as mother and son strength workouts where we can hit the gym together.
@gabrielstrength was my biggest baby who weighed in at a whopping 8lb 13oz when he arrived three weeks early in a beautiful planned home birth 21 years ago. He’s still growing 😍 and I’m just bowled over by his gains in strength and size. I can only take a small amount of credit for this, I think growing up with a mother who lifts and has always trained means this has been normalised for him.
The reason he’s made incredible progress though is down to his thirst for knowledge. He conducts his own research and has invested time in educating himself on training methods and approaches as well as nutritional strategies. I couldn’t be more proud.
If you’ve got family staying with you, or you’re travelling to family for Christmas, how about getting everyone involved in fitness activities? The holidays don’t have to put a stop to training, consider a few modifications so you can do things together. Getting into the gym with family members , or going for a long bike ride or walk are great ways to bond and just as enjoyable as sitting and watching a Christmas film together.
I’m pleased my son is home because it means I have a spotter in the gym which was a huge help this morning 😊#familyfitness#motherson#motherandson#gymtime#womenwholift#christmasfitness#stronglife#trainingpartner
E finalmente il grande giorno è arrivato... Uno dei tuoi e dei miei grandi giorni... la tua nascita... il primo giorno di scuola... la prima volta allo stadio.. la prima volta che sei partito da solo.. le tue partite di calcio...le vittorie (🙄) della nostra Roma e ora la tua laurea.. bravo amore mio.. è una nuova partenza .. e io ci sarò sempre ❤
Happiness is cooking Healthy with your Family for the Holidays 🎄👩🏻🍳💕
Safura of @jaxvegancouple and her son Farhan loved preparing a delectable Whole Foods plant-based meal at the @jaxcookingstudio! They loved spicing up these yummy dishes they made: Lentil Loaf and Mushroom Gravy
Sweet Potato Casserole
Check their Instagram Highlight stories to see all the details from the class📸😋👩🏻🍳
Today is the day that all the feelings are coming to the surface. I feel really sad because I am grieving the idea of having a ‘proper’ family. I feel really exhausted because work has been extra challenging these few days and I spend my free time packing and getting ready to move out. I feel angry because the people who are supposed to be helping me (council) are ignoring me. I feel scared because the idea of going to a hostel with a newborn makes me cry every time I think of it, because I have no control of what happens next, because I don’t know what I am doing, I never held a baby for longer than few minutes, now it’ll be 24/7 of responsibility and care. I am scared I won’t be able to keep my baby safe and healthy in the environment I am likely to end up in. I am scared because I was pinning hope on something that now might not go through, not without losing my integrity, and I can’t let that happen.
All of this is so overwhelming and tiring, yet I am so excited to hold my baby in my arms and I already know that no matter what happens from now on, I will keep my shit together for him, I’ll keep trying and keep going for him. And I know he is absolutely worth it. Thank you for reading. I am off to have a little cry to release all these emotions snd keep my sanity 🙏🏼💜💪🏼 #pregnancy#pregnant#motherhood#singlemom#homeless#homelessness#hiddenhomeless#overwhelmed#stayingstrong#motherandson#itsworthit