Hidup adalah bLur
Setiap yg kita lakukan xsemest nyai balasan sama yg dpt..
Terkadang kita buat baik tapi yg kita dapat malah sebalik nya.. Itu lha kehidupan penuh dengan dugaan
Maka tabah lah hadapi nya
Meskipun eya terkadang menyakit kan... #MADNESS
I have spent my recent nights - and by recent I mean since a year now - I have spent these nights into allowing myself to question 'what art means to me?'. This is the question lingering upon my skin like insects in mortuary. What art means to me? What does it do to me and most importantly - what does it do FOR ME?
There is a reason why the human mind always wants to be part of things and situations that it benefits from. 'Do this because you will get that .. do that inorder for this .. if we did this a certain way, it would be great for ..'
Spending endless nights asking myself the same question on the loop I have come to ask myself a new one. No I haven't still recieved an answer for either one of them. Now, I ask myself, what am I doing for art? What am I getting my art into? Why does my art appear the way it appears, or does it even appear physically? For once - I am wanting to be part of something where I feel lost rather than found - for once I am being mad enough to question my madness.
Now - I ask myself - the question that I had long been afraid to ask - Is my art mad enough to be called art? Because for me, anything that involves madness is art. This definition might not work for you but it works for me. So, for anything that I abandon my sleep and routine for, anything that defines and holds my values on a pedestal, things that I sweat upon and things that I have achieved by crying and craving is - my madness towards it. It is my definition of art.
Because art is mad. It is sleepless. It is swollen eyes. It is backache. It is vulnearable. It is draining. It is unwashed. Long due. Long grown. Ink stained skin. It is anything except comfortable, and serene.
Art is restless, unsettled madness.
You are madness because you are art.
I love this quote which I found somewhere over the internet and since then it has been stuck on the pages of my journal. Power to your madness!