Adventures of a Bachelorette Party Chauffer Part 8: Not sure why I'm here. Social anxiety is through the roof. Badgers are getting destroyed. Time to move on... #mke#walkerspoint#cripplinganxiety#loner
Can you relate? Sometimes I wish I could stop my feelings. Stop the thoughts that run riot in my brain 🧠 those feelings that people are talking 🗣 behind my back. Those thoughts 💭 that I am never going to be good enough. It’s #worldmentalhealthday and today I’m shouting out to everyone like me out there. Those suffering anxiety on a daily basis. Those worrying about everything and everyone. I try to squash 👊🏻 those feelings but sometimes they can break you. #itsokaynottobeokay#mentalhealthawareness
It’s Okay Not to be Okay pins are back in the shop, shown here in this fantastic @for_the_share_of_flair mental health pin collection. Definitely follow them if you haven’t! They post about upcoming shows, a weekly post of pin drops, and loads of other great pin posts. Off topic of that, I’m going through a very not okay period currently which I’ll probably post about soon. I’m really struggling, doing my best, and little more. We put a lot of pressure on ourselves, but when you’re slipping off the rails it really is okay to only focus on getting back on. It isn’t lazy. It is hard and necessary. I know we have varying abilities of only focusing on getting well (work, kiddies, etc.), but just be sure to be compassionate toward yourself. You deserve that.
You can’t see the daily suffering through my smile. You can’t see the panic in my eyes or hear me tell myself to go sit in the car.
This picture was from a few years back. I still remember how I felt. I still remember the struggle I had when going out anywhere. The panic feeling, feeling faint, weak,sweaty and racing heart. It didn’t matter what I was doing or who I was with. I had these feelings daily. Daily I had to try to keep a smile on my face so no one would see my struggles. I thought I was a freak, I felt alone. Some friends who I opened up about this just didn’t get it, didn’t support me. So I decided not to let anyone else know what I was going through because I was afraid of not being accepted.
But I’ve realized a couple things:
1. I’ve learned that talking about your struggles makes me you a stronger person.
2. You don’t need friends in your life if they don’t support you and aren’t there for you when you need it most.
3. Only YOU have the power to keep pushing to better yourself in any situation.
I still have my moments when my anxiety acts up but I’ve come such a long way from that girl in the picture. Now I surround myself with the kind of people who make me feel like I’m not alone. Who are there for me when I need them most.
So If you ever feel alone and you can’t get out of whatever difficult time you’re having just remember to keep pushing yourself. You have the ability to live the life you want. And If you want some amazing people supporting you too msg me! #anxiety#dailyanxiety#cripplinganxiety#smilethroughthepain#panic#hidingtherealme#hidingthepain#strong#keeppushingyourself#friendswhosupportfriends#surroundyourselfwithgoodpeople
Hi!! Over the last couple of weeks I have taken a big step back from social media to get working on some new projects and bring some fresh energy into my practice. Over this past year I have found that there has been a shift in who I have been helping the most, so I am happy to find that I am ready to narrow down exactly who I help the most, so that I can help that population even further. After working with many clients struggling to overcome crippling anxiety, I have had the honor of watching these clients take huge steps towards being more comfortable in themselves and achieving things that they once thought impossible. I'm talking people who couldn't leave their homes who wound up boarding an airplane, people struggling to keep jobs to maintaining stable employment for over a year, people struggling with commitment to feeling strong in deciding to get married, and others who have just been so deep in their anxiety struggle that they lost themselves- to finding their feet again and regaining their life and relationships. I have found so much crazy success and joy working with this population that I have decided to devote myself to this small niche in mental health: anxiety, OCD, and phobia.
Thank you to all of you who follow and engage with my content and encourage me to keep growing in sometimes a very difficult field to keep afloat in. Thank you for your patience as I've done some re-evaluating and as I continue to work on re-naming myself and putting myself out there to a specific group. I can't wait to get to helping more of those that need this specialized form of therapy to win back their lives.
Right, I'm back but nothing has improved
To be honest, it's all gotten worse but I can't put this off forever.
My anxiety has gotten worse (yeah I didn't think that was possible either) but it comes to a point in a period of 5days, I've almost had 2 panic attacks, and I don't normally ever get panic attacks. College isn't helping either.
I have an assessment to design and create a whole program in 20 days... Not great at all
My target for this year is A in photography, DD in computing. High I know, but I'll try, but to be honest, even I'm Thinking - with my anxiety - that's not going to be possible.
Going to Ireland for the Month's mind and... Ugh, just a lot is happening this end of month and in October...
#transformationtuesday There’s 6 months between when these photos were taken. Not only am I physically stronger (and down 15lbs!), but I feel so mentally strong too.
I knew that I wanted to change. Be a stronger person. Be a better mom. I didn’t want to live with daily anxiety that left me weak, shaky and self doubting. I finally told myself that I needed help. I needed to change something in my life. I needed to change for myself and for my family.
So I joined an anxiety and panic attack support group on social media.
I turned to exercise and nutrition (something that has always helped me in the past with my anxiety). I tried to eliminate the negative things in my life.
It took time to achieve these changes consistently and I’m still working at it daily. I still have my days when my anxiety creeps up and I feel down in the dumps. But I’m learning how to manage it with the support of my family and friends. And now I have the support of fitness and nutrition.
So if you’re ever feeling this way, just know that you’re not alone. And if you ever need someone to talk to, I’m always here to offer advice or to simply listen!
R U OK?
I’m kinda not, most of the time.
Anxiety ate me whole on Sunday, and I distracted myself playing video games with Adam, which helped until I then managed to neglect handing in my assignment for Neurophysiology. The assignment I worked for HOURS on, due to my anxiety. The one that was actually ready DAYS earlier but hadn’t been uploaded due to my anxiety saying “what IF I want to slightly change another word or two here or there before that final submission??” I realised I hadn’t submitted it at 11:47pm the night it was due. I ran through my house and tore my computer out of my bag, and helplessly watched my final 8 minutes before the maximum due date slip away, beachball of death rolling around on my slow old computer screen. I submitted 7 minutes late and cried myself to sleep.
Anxiety is an asshole. Some days I beat it, some days it beats me.
I don’t always need suggestions of what to do to change things, I know my anxiety goes up and down. Sometimes I just need a caring ear, and someone to say hey that sucks but you’re awesome, it’s ok to be overwhelmed right now.
Ask your buddies if they’re ok, and be there for them no matter what.