Why You Need To Be Alone Sometimes
Solitude allows you to reboot your brain and unwind. Constantly being "on" doesn't give your brain a chance to rest and replenish itself. Being by yourself with no distractions gives you the chance to clear your mind, focus, and think more clearly. It's an opportunity to revitalize your mind and body at the same time.
Solitude also gives you an opportunity to discover yourself and find your own voice. When you're part of a group, you're more likely to go along with what the group is doing or thinking, which aren't always the actions you would take or the decisions you would make if you were on your own.
There are times when I need nothing but the sweetness of my solitude (many times actually.) But please know, that like the ocean promises the shore, I will never leave without coming back to you. - d.a.f. #introvertatheart#sweetdreams
If there’s one thing I’m good at, it’s being alone. I find so much peace of mind and joy being by myself. Not necessarily disconnected completely, but for the most part I can be alone, communicate minimally and be totally and completely content for weeks.
Now I will say it wasn’t always this way. I used to hate Sundays. The day before work, feeling tired from a weekend of partying, my friends were too hung over to do anything, and at that time I had recently ended a relationship and I was ALONE. Capital letters, ALONE! Or at least it felt that way..... but what it really was... I felt rejected.... I felt like there was something wrong with being alone. That being alone meant I was unloved, unwanted and unworthy of attention. It wasn’t that I was actually alone. I was focusing my thoughts on what I wanted and DIDN’T have.
The next phase was just being really busy... packing my schedule so tight I couldn’t be lonely. Seminars every weekend, planning, purpose, working, training for a marathon, volunteering.... but it was just distracting me from feeling alone. I even recognized I was doing it.
Then I realized what alone time actually was for me, what it really brought me, I recognized that I could actually love alone time if I created a new context for it.
I realized that being alone didn’t mean I wasn’t loved, adored and cherished. I realized that being alone didn’t mean I wasn’t supported and accepted.
So here I am, in Monterey, alone, by choice, for a few weeks and so far it’s been amazing.
It’s in this alone time that I get to: *Follow my intuition 100% of the time *Go to bed early and sleep 8-10 hours and wake up feeling so rested. *I get to walk on the beach and catch up on all of the audio books and podcasts I’ve been wanting to listen to. *I get to cook and eat exactly what I want and nourish my body with exactly what it needs. *I get to work uninterrupted and finish all kinds of projects I’ve been working on.
Most importantly, I feel rested, rejuvenated, relaxed, connected to my intuition and at peace.
If you’re feeling lonely, I hope you create a new context for being alone and recognize the amazing opportunity for magic and miracles.
“We are only alone when we abandon ourselves.”
As grateful as I am for all the amazing people in my life that I get to spend my time with I am also grateful for the time I get to spend alone. Time to myself has allows me to show up better for the people in my life. It allows my mind to wander in order to think creatively, solve problems, and optimize my life in ways not possible when I’m focused on distractions. It has allowed me to discover myself and find my voice. Because I know myself better, established my own self identity, I am more emotionally available for others. My relationships are healthier and I am happier.
What does self discovery/alone time mean to you?